And then, there's the part that does not feel so good. That thing called commencement? It's happening, this Tuesday and Wednesday, to be exact. That thing called packing and moving back home? It's happening way too soon. That thing called REAL LIFE? I don't even want to think about it! I'm not ready, neither physically nor mentally for any of it. It's not that I'm not excited about graduation and entering "the real world,"it's just that I've had such an amazing four years at Columbia, and there's so much I wish I could have done had I had the chance. I wish I could have taken a few more crazy classes outside the architecture department, just for fun; I wish I had eaten more slices of Koronet's pizza and had more of Tom's famous milkshakes; I wish I had made more of an effort to visit new up and coming museums, and I wish I had learned to drink coffee earlier in my college career, so that I could have stayed awake and been more active in all of my classes, because damn, I was really fortunate to have taken classes with incredibly smart and interesting classmates and professors, and I sometimes feel like I missed out on truly learning what was being taught. In the end though, I loved every moment of college (even if I didn't know it at the moment, aka, the weekend before every design studio final review), and I wouldn't trade it for the world. I've made amazing friends, met inspiring professors, grown into my own person, and affirmed my love of New York City and Columbia. As excited as I am to excited to see what comes next, I think that for now, I'm going to continue to live in this mini panic mode of "oh-my-god-I'm-graduating-the-day-after-tomorrow-wtf."
Sunday, May 19, 2013
Saturday, May 11, 2013
Hello, again! I'm back already, and I have yet another delicious recipe that is perfect for Mother's Day to share with you. Yes, I know it's Saturday, and that Mother's Day is tomorrow, but you know me. I leave everything to the last minute and am then always in some kind of major panic mode with my brain scrambling to frantically pull things together. Today is no exception. I have two more assignments left in my college career. They're due in only a few very short days, and I'm not even close to feeling comfortable enough to say that I'm ready for them. Sleep deprivation from portfolio season made me skip/fall asleep in one too many Japanese architecture lectures, so now I'm stuck with incomplete notes and a mega pile of 275 flashcards to memorize (this is not a joke), and my independent research project...sigh. I can't do it! I just can't bring myself to write up the final report, because I just want to be finished with work, and I'm so close! But anyway. My last exam and last presentation in college have had me working nonstop since Tuesday, since I literally can't put off my prep-work any more than I already have.
I've found all kinds of ways to put off doing work though, regardless of how soon my deadlines are. I've done my laundry; I've cleaned my room; I've started packing; I've taken naps; I've gone to the gym. I'm even writing this blog post, which I had been hoping to publish a few days ago and then decided to simply post after Mother's Day due to lack of time, as another attempt to avoid doing the work that's looming over my head. Yep. I'm that desperate. But I mean, Mother's Day and quiche are legitimate reasons to put off doing work, right? I think so.
Thursday, May 9, 2013
Guess what guys. At this exact time (10:56 AM) in exactly two weeks (May 23, 2013), I will be officially moving out of college...for the LAST time. I will also have a real Bachelor's degree. It's a bit crazy, and I don't know if I can handle those thoughts just yet, so I will be pushing them aside (again), and talking about something else, something that I know everyone can relate to. My mama! Ok, maybe you can't all relate to my mom, but you all have your own moms that you can think about. Mother's Day is quickly approaching, and as always, I'm a few days behind on my posting. I had two Mother's Day related posts in mind, but then life got in the way, and I had a final studio review that lasted until 9 pm, after which I promptly went to bed because I physically could not keep my eyes open any longer, and two full 9-5 days of work followed by senior dinners and events. Classes may have ended on Monday, but Tuesday and Wednesday I was the busiest little bee. But anyway, back to my mama!
My family doesn't usually do anything overly elaborate for Mother's Day. We usually go to a family potluck-style brunch at my cousin's house for some relaxed Mother's Day fun, or well, at least that's what I've been told. I've had to miss the last three Mother's Day celebrations because I've had final exams to study for and papers to write (actually, now that I think about it, I had an exam on Mother's Day my freshman year...yep, I had a final exam on a Sunday...). This year, however, will be different. I only have one exam to study for, and one independent research project to finish (FREAKING out about this one, as I'm still so behind, but that's obviously nothing new), so I'm going home to be with my family on Sunday, and I'm so excited! I'm going home on Saturday, and my mom is going to make my grandma's super famous arroz con verduras for dinner, as per my request. Ahh, gotta love mom for that! I'm very excited to go home and spend some time with my mom and all the other important moms in my life, and of course, I'm equally excited for brunch. Did I ever tell you guys how much I love brunch? No? Well, guys, I'm slightly obsessed with brunch. It's true.
Friday, May 3, 2013
I'm a bit frustrated at the moment. It's 6:45 AM, and I'm just starting to write this post, because I "Instagrammed" (because that's a verb now), a photo of these lovely orange chocolate chunk bundt cakes with chocolate ganache (more on those later), and said they'd be on the blog today (which they are, because I like to keep my promises). I'm writing this post at 6:45 AM out of frustration because I've been up all night working on my final for my studio workshop class that's due on Monday. Sure, I have plenty of time until then, but I have other things to take care of this weekend, and that fact that I've been working all night and am still not happy with how my design looks is just annoying. So, I decided to stop for a bit, and write about cake. That should solve all my problems..or at least distract me for a bit.
These next two weeks are going to be so hellish, I can feel it. I'm SO close to being done with classes and college in general, but it's just so hard to force myself to stay focused. I can literally count using the fingers on one hand the number of things I have left to do before officially being done with all of my classes and finals (one more lecture, one more studio pinup, one final, and one independent research project to go), and while I know that 2 out of the 4 things that remain will be complete by Monday night, it still feels like that is too far off. I just want to be finished already, I'm exhausted! I need a nap, both literally and physically. Ugh.
Saturday, April 27, 2013
It's April 27, and I'm starting to freak out. Well, not really, but just a little. There's so much for me to do, and I just don't want to do anything. Yep, senioritis has kicked in, and I feel like I've been fighting with myself to get all the work I have to do done. It's terrible, because I need to look for a job so that I can hopefully enter the real world once I graduate, meaning that I have to work on my online portfolio and research/apply to every firm ever in hopes of getting at least one phone call back for an interview. That kind of work isn't too bad though, it's just my school work that is starting to finally get to me. I'm feeling uninspired for my studio workshop, lazy about my independent study (even though my research has gotten really interesting lately), and just blahhhh about my Japanese architecture class. I mean, I still think that everything is interesting, but working on my blog and looking for a real job just seem more interesting and important. Basically, I'm just over all this work I have to do. Can I just graduate now, please?
It still boggles my mind that graduation is so soon...it's only like three and a half weeks from now! Where did the time go!? As much as I'm ready to get out of here (believe me, I am, these past four years have been ridiculously stressful at times), I still wish I could stay for another couple of semesters. There's so many random classes that I would have loved to have taken if I had the time! Womp. But in any case, it's still crazy. Next week is my last full week of classes, with the following Monday being my actual last day of undergraduate classes...ever. Once that happens, I will be one exam and one research paper/presentation away from being completely done with everything ever. It sounds too good to be true! I'm a definitely excited for these next few weeks that are coming up, but I'm also a little nervous. Times like these call for comforting sweets. How does some homemade cookies and cream ice cream sound?
Sounds pretty comforting to me...and yummy!
Monday, April 22, 2013
There's been many a night where I have found myself typing away at my computer writing a 10-page paper the night before it was due in Butler library (thank you, Contemporary Civilizations). I've never been very good at planning ahead, especially when it comes to writing papers. I usually spend more time than necessary thinking of what to write before I look at the time and realize that it's already midnight, I have class at 9, and I've only written 2 out of 10 pages. Or, in more recent situations, I've looked at the time and realize that it's already 3 am, and I've somehow managed to only complete 1 out of the 3 renderings I had been meaning to make progress towards finishing. Even more recent, aka, right now, as I sit typing this blog post, I've looked at the time, seen that it's 4 am, and have decided that I better get on with writing that blog post that I had been meaning to publish the day before. This is my life, unfortunately. I sometimes get easily distracted, and usually spend way too much time over-thinking things and being indecisive to be as productive as I'd like to be. But anyway. I had a point to make, I promise.
Ok, so it's not really too much of a point, but my initial reason for bringing up my poor procrastination habits in Butler is actually relevant, and not because it is an analogous situation to the one taking place right now, as I write this post at 4 am on Monday morning, when most normal people are sleeping in their beds (thank goodness my first class isn't until 1 pm!). You see, Butler, and I guess most of the cafes on Columbia's campus have this one very delicious looking snack that I've always wanted to get: crumb cake. Now, I know that crumb cake isn't really anything over-the-top, or something to obsess over, but there's just something about those crumb cakes that have been drizzled with chocolate in the glass displays at the Butler cafe that makes me want one SO badly every time I see one. It's kind of ridiculous. I've managed to use all the self control I have to avoid getting a piece in these past couple of years, which is a pretty amazing feat, considering that the majority of the time I walk into the Butler cafe it's 2 am and it's about to close and I'm sleepy and am getting my last coffee that will hopefully hold me over until morning. There's always a piece of coffee cake when I go to the cafe, and it always tempts me. It's like it knows that I'm in a vulnerable state of existence or something.
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
I woke up on this lovely spring morning (so happy I can finallllyyyy say that), with a plan. I had planned out the night before to wake up early, run to the library, and sit myself down to do work for three hours on my independent study project. Then after that, I was going to get lunch, grab a coffee, and go to class. During my time at the library, I was supposed to write this blog post about strawberries and cream eclairs, and learn a thing or two about prefabrication. Note that I used the word "supposed." I use that word because, of course, my plan didn't actually work out. I did wake up early, and I did get to the library right when it opened, but then that's where the plan fell apart. After I did my fifteen minutes of online procrastination (you know, Reddit, Foodgawker, etc), I kinda just lost it.
I kinda lost all the motivation I had to do work and be productive. My productive spark just died, and I could feel it. I developed a splitting headache while sitting at the library, and no matter what I did, I just couldn't focus on anything or read the several books that were sitting in front of me. My body just wouldn't let me, as much as I was trying to force myself to do work. So then, I decided that the only thing to do was to try to sleep this headache off. Rather than walk back to my room and sleep in a bed like a normal person, my laziness (and also my desire to eventually get some work done) got the best of me, and I decided to just take a nap right where I was, right at my desk in the library. Yep. I was the girl who was passed out in the library, and it was only 9:30 AM. #senioritis